How to FINALLY Figure Out How to Have It All Without Sacrifice
Being a mom isn't easy.
Being a mom with big, entrepreneurial dreams is harder still.
We want so much to create and achieve something that is our own. Something we can taste and touch and breathe life into...something that allows us to feel needed and special and powerful outside the walls of our home. But motherhood beckons...not only of our time and energy, but of our heart. We long to be present. We want to take off time to be with them. We crave slower summer days to soak it all up before they're grown and gone.
But business is loud, and the fears of failure louder.
We want it all.
We want to be good, happy present moms. We want to grow our businesses and nourish our souls outside of motherhood. We want success for us AND for our families. But how?
Where does the time come from? What about the energy? What part of ourselves and our needs do we need to sacrifice, to trade, in order to make it all work?
"Take my sleep and give me success. Take my health and give me moments with my child. Take my patience. Take my peace. It's a price I'm willing to pay to have it all"
But is it all, really? How can you have it all when you've traded away the very things you think success will give you? Freedom. Peace. Presence. Joy. Relief.
We've been trading our very souls away for years, thinking great sacrifice will bring us great rewards, but it won't.
The price you've paid in pursuit of the dream is too high because it will never be enough. It will continue to take, and steal, and sneak away your life until success is yours but YOU are gone.
Exhausted. Overwhelmed. Spread thin. Being too much for too many. Too weary. Too tired. Too self sacrificed to enjoy what you've built.
The happily ever after we're all chasing isn't built with our blood, sweat, and tears. It can't be achieved by dismembering our souls, no matter how much we think cutting ourselves apart, giving some here and some there, severing our very being like Horcruxes, will help us get there faster.
Because your true success requires ALL of you. Your heart AND soul. Your laughter and rest.
Your work and your play. And every time you cut away a part of who you are, every time you deny, not only the desires of your soul, but the needs of your body, you lose.
You get weaker and weaker.
Heavier and heavier.
The weight of it all upon your bony, thin, tired, overworked shoulders. "Why isn't it more beautiful than this?" you wonder. "Where is my happily ever after? Why can't I seem to do it all?"
Because you're living torn in 2. Not 2 even, torn in pieces. Fractured. Scattered. Conflicted. Competing. Pulled in every direction except the one that works.
We are powerful enough to have it all, to birth babies and business, to create life and wealth and success in all areas. But we can't do it the way we've always done it.
We can't do it fractured, torn, and broken down to our bare essentials.
We can only do it from our full power...from our FULLNESS. Our WHOLENESS.
It begins by healing the parts of yourself you've let die. It begins by remembering who you are, what you need, and what matters.
It begins by honoring yourself as much as you honor your family AND your big dreams.
It can be done, but not the way we've tried to do it.
Having it all is NOT about being it all to everyone or doing it all. It's a not about some external standard of perfection. It's not another expectation women need to live up to.
Having it all simply means having ALL the things YOU desire. It means creating a life by design, not default. It means going for what you really want (in all areas) instead of settling for what you think you can get.
We've been taught that effort + time = results. Essentially the path to success is built with hard work over long periods of time.
Ain't no busy mom got time for that.
Which is why you might have thought "having it all" wasn't possible, at least without more work and effort and pushing you don't have the time and energy for.
And here's the truth, if you buy into the old way of doing things, if you think you have to follow the path to success of working away, slowly, day by day until you've worked enough to feel "worthy" of the life you desire, then they're right, you can't have it.
It's not possible that way.
There isn't enough hours in the day or years in your lifetime to get there on force and effort alone.
Which is why you've likely given up the dream, thinking it's impossible or will take too long to get there...or have doubled down on the hustle and are on the cusp of a breakdown.
I've done both.
And I'm so glad I found a better way.
You see, if you dare to do things differently, if you stop listening to the rules and stop following the path to success that isn't going to lead you anywhere but self abandonment and utter burn out, you CAN HAVE IT ALL without settling.
But there are 3 important things you must first shift in order to make it work
- You have to care more about how you feel, about the journey than the destination
- You have to trust yourself and your inner guide-ess more than the experts
- You have to believe more in where you are going than where you are today.
My unpopular opinion is that moms can have it all, AND at the same time.
Do you believe you can have it all at the same time? Do you want to? I'd love to hear your thoughts!